Prom Schmom!

She is ready for the prom safari, now!

To get my mind off the recovery (and the 1" portion of my incision that is just not closing at the fat roll!), I've been doing some light reading. Most of my reading for the last two days have been Chelsea Handler's two memoirs, so I thought it was high time for some real news. And by "real news", I mean skipping anything really newsworthy and diving right into the lifestyle section of my online papers. That's how I do it.

I hit a little golden nugget when I found a piece in the NYT on parents and teenagers still spending ridiculous amounts of money on prom regardless of the recession. This is the stuff I live for: I just knew liberal elites who read the paper (I suppose myself included) were going to have a field day in the comments section. That's pretty much what I do: I spend three minutes reading the article proper, and then three times that salivating over the commentary.

I like reading stuff about America's obsession with over-the-top celebrations (bar and bat mitzvahs, weddings, sweet sixteens, and of course, prom!). I did not go to prom. I always thought it silly (Okay, okay! Let's ignore the fact I was not asked by a member of the opposite sex, jeez!). Now, if you wear a cheap dress and take it for what it's worth (a dance to cap off your high school years) I have no problem with proms. The thing is, most people I knew in my graduating class took it as the second coming. They spent no less than four months preparing for this blessed event. They tanned for months (my co-workers who tan know how I feel about this, because I always heckle them as they skirt out the door). They get their hair, make-up, and nails done, too. I just never had any...craving to do this. What work it entails!

I'd have to listen endlessly about emotionally-wrought decisions like, "I just don't know if mauve works for me, and Jessica said she was wearing mauve too!" and, "I am thinking of wearing this sparkly lotion but I don't want to look slutty; Kathryn, do you think Brian will like this lotion?" Of course, I think "Brian" had things on his mind other than lotion, if you get my drift. So I did what any girl not going to prom did: I hid out in the school newspaper and band rooms for the four months leading up to the prom and on the night of I worked dishing ice and custard at Rita's Italian Ice as I watched their stretch limos whiz by.

A Prom With All the Glitz, but Every Dollar Squeezed

By CHRISTINE HAUGHNEY

Even as the recession forces families to redefine their financial priorities, most are still willing to pay for an event they consider a rite of passage.