Sunday, May 3, 2009

Disturbing Developments

Development 1: I realized something yesterday that I was not prepared for: I can no longer suck in my gut. Now, let's be honest, my torso mostly consists of fat, but I relished those few pounds of muscle because they helped me suck in my big belly. Now my fleshy mid-section sticks out past my boobs and I really find this unsettling! (Especially since Spanx is so much!) I know going to the gym once I heal is an option so I wouldn't have to spend a quarter of my salary on girdles, but that doesn't really appeal to me either.

Development 2: It hurts to pee. Not the burning, frequency type of hurting to pee that is associated with a urinary tract infection. This is more mechanical. I woke up this morning and when I peed - especially when my bladder was almost voided - it HURT! The pain felt deep and ran up my groin. I know you can get infections from catheters but I had my out a whole week ago (and it was in for less than 24 hours). My mom said, "Maybe your bladder is bruised." So now I'm thinking Dr. P grazed my blad with his scalpel and conveniently didn't tell me.

Development 3: My incision is red and tender, particularly at the fat roll (sorry my fat roll has taken so much prominence lately, but it really is the center of my life at the moment). I still have a section of the incision where the skin is not connected, too. I called the doctor's office on Friday feeling very smug because I warned them about this fat roll, and Dr. P's nurse told me when I see him on Tuesday he may reinforce the incision with something or other and that, no, my incision was not infected because it had to be leaking goo and green stuff to have that lovely affliction. I told her it was not leaking green stuff but was just tender and gross, and she said I'm probably a-okay then.

Development 4: I cannot sleep (which is why I am writing this at 3 am). I guess this is the side effect of doing absolutely nothing all day; I have no way to use up energy! Fortunately, my friend Angela visited today with a Welsh Corgi she is dog-sitting, but to me that thing kind of looked like a fat groundhog. I say this in all kindness but seriously, its weight would wobble left and right as it walked with its stubby legs. The thing had a bigger gut than me. He also didn't like me and growled a few times, and Angela said this was because I kept calling him names. I guess that's fair.

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