What a pain in the gut!

(Bingo! That's where the pain is!)

Well, Entocort totally blew it. I think we all suspected this was going to happen, though. The pain has worsened, and I fear surgery is now inevitable and soon. For the last couple days the pain has been to the point where I just have to focus on breathing to get through it, and anything to get my mind off it (which is really impossible, but my "cheap" list helped). It's the worst at night.

About a month ago my GI gave me a script for Percocet and I lost it (smart move). I'm on something else for pain but it's no longer getting the job done. I miss the Dilaudid! I hate to say this, but I think I have the (smallest) glimpse into why people develop narcotic addictions. When I was in the hospital and they shot that through my IV, it was in complete and utter bliss. A warm wave of soothing relief; I just closed my eyes and bathed in that. Next week I see my GI again, and the following Tuesday I have an appointment with another GI for a second opinion. And I can't stop thinking about work. A team member is going on maternity leave next month, and so they will already be short-staffed. When I mentioned surgery is a possibility, I said, "Oh, yeah, two weeks, three at most" but now I'm reading about it more and I think I was a bit too cavalier. This is major surgery! I'll be having almost a foot of my small intestine cut out! That gives me the willies.

Matt and Penny have been very supportive. Although they hate spending their evenings in the bedroom, they keep me company as I lay in bed (well, Penny whines occasionally....and now that I think about it, Matt does too), although right now they're both sleeping peacefully.

I hope you have a good night, too.

Go Entocort!

A big, heartfelt thank you to everyone who contributed to the Crohn's walk. As I write this, Team Gutsy just surpassed $500, which I think is simply amazing.

I think with these things - these chronic, nagging diseases - the best thing you can ask for is a team of medical professionals who will go to bat for you: who follow your case, and think about your case after you leave the office, and who consult their colleagues for a second opinion. I have that. My GI compassionately listens as I breathlessly spout-off lists of medications and alternative treatment options. I've tried several so far - and at this stage - as I wrote below, I'm at a crossroads. We're trying a last-ditch effort: Entocort, a steroid I haven't tried in the past (I've been on the lovely Prednisone before). I'm also giving Probiotics another go. We'll give it a few weeks, and if the pain persists, I will have surgery.

I didn't come to this decision easily, but once I made it, I've been delightfully at peace. It was a lot of nights filled with me, looking at Matt, saying "What should I do?" and him really not knowing what to say. Since I haven't been feeling well, we've been spending a lot of our evenings in bed, he on his computer, and me curled up watching nightly sitcoms, content under my covers.

Thank you again for contributing.